Sai Lao grew up in his grandparent's home in northern Shan State. He had a difficult childhood because he was separated from his parents and was looked down upon by many people.

Today, he lives on his own in Chiang Mai and works to take care of himself.

One week later, I met with Sai Lao to interview him about his life. This is his story, told in his own words:

I was born in Muse, Shan State, and grew up in a nearby village. I am now 17 years old.  My father died four years ago. My mother was released from prison last year, when I started 10th grade. I have two brothers.  My elder brother is 22 years old and my second brother is 20 years old. My elder brother works in Chiang Mai as a brick layer. My second brother got married in my village.

I lived happily with my parents and brothers in our home until I was 5 year-old.

However, the happiness ended when my mother went to prison and my father died soon after. My father was an opium addict when I was very young. Once my father put his opium package on the table and police arrived at my home unexpectedly. When police saw the drugs on the table, they asked who owned it. My father fled from the house and my mother confessed it's her opium to save my father from being arrested. So, she was sentenced to 16 years in prison.

Eventually, she was released after 8 years for good behavior.

My father left the family. So, my grandmother from my father’s side brought us three children to her home in Sel Lant village. I remembered that the day; it was my 6th birthday.

I studied 1th to 5th grade in school in Sel Lant village. Grandmother paid all my school fees and took care of me.

When I was in 5th grade, sometimes I fought with other students. When they played football, I told them I wanted to play with them. They refused and said, "Your father was a drug addict and your mother was a prisoner. They pushed me away. They also told me 'don't come near us. If you come to near us, your prison smell would spread to us'. So, I was very angry with them and fought with them. Then I was sent to the principal's office. I still remember this time.
I also remember we were very comfortable living at Grandmother's home. My father also came to live in grandmother's house with us. At that time, I was in 1st grade. We were very happy even though our mother was away from us.

At that time, my father was a drug addict and he didn't work. But, he demanded money many times from our grandmother.

My happiest time was when my father returned home from outside. At that time, he would make a joke for me. I was also very happy when my father and I cooked a curry together in our home. As well, I was happy when my father and I went to play a computer game at an internet café.

I was also happy when my grandmother and I visited my mother in prison. Sometimes we had to wait at the entrance of the prison because we went there very early.

When I saw my mother, I could not speak and we cried together. Even though we worried a lot,  these days were the happiest days of my life.

Sometimes, my friends ordered me to sharpen the pencils in our class. Sometimes, they ordered me to buy snacks. It was difficult to study in my class room. Sometimes, my friends wrote, ‘your father is a drug addict and you will become a drug addict one day’ on the paper and they threw the paper at me.

I had no friend to eat food together at lunch time. I was lonely and silent to eat food at lunch time. When class time was over, nobody picked up me. I had to go back home alone. Nobody picked me at school on the rainy day even though my friend's parents picked up them with umbrella. My grandparents did come to give me umbrella at school.

I was very upset when I went to a market with my grandmother. My friends visited the market with their parents. They seemed to be very happy because their parents bought them whatever they demanded. I used to be very happy like them when I lived with my father and mother.

Some people, who looked down on me told me, ‘We saw your father come out of a house where they sell drugs.’ Some people said our living in the village harmed the reputation of the village.

Sometimes, I really wanted to talk with my friends and tell them I was not guilty of my father’s crimes. But their parents forbid them to talk with me. 

"It was very painful living like this. Sometimes, I wanted to run away. However, I could not  because I was lucky my grandmother took care of me.

Sometimes, I felt my father made these problems for us. I also thought, if I became a father, I wouldn't use drugs and I would try to be a good father.

My grandmother knew many people looked down us. So, she moved us to another school.

I studied 5th to 8th grade at a school in the town of Bhamo.  Then I returned to my village and continued in  9th grade.

My grandmother paid all of my school fees. Then, my mother was released from prison when I attended the 10th grade.

Even though many people, including some of my friends looked down me, I worked  hard to pass grade 10. Finally, I passed the 10th grade from a school in Muse.

I was not happy, even though I passed the 10th grade. I was bored because my friends went to study at university but I could not go. My grandmother could not afford the tuition and registration fees at university.

At that time, other friends, who did not go to university but were not working called me to go outside every night. In the beginning, I didn't go with them but did go eventually. A few months later, we used a drug similar to opium.

Within a month, my uncle knew I used drug. He sent me to live with my other uncle, who works in Chiang Mai, Thailand.

My elder brother also works in Chiang Mai as a brick layer. My second brother got married in my village.

Now, I study at BEAM Foundation School from 8:30 a.m. to 12 p.m. every school day. Then I work at Chiangmai Night Bazzar from 2 p.m. to 1a.m. So, I arrive to my room around 2 a.m. every morning, he said.

When I arrived in Chiang Mai, I wanted to use opium but I could control myself. I knew nobody would come to help me. I have to stand on my own two feet.

I understand the negative effects of drugs. Now, I don't have any desire to use opium. When I talk to my friends about using drugs, I tell them what happened to my addicted father.

My brother and I work hard in Chiang Mai. Our goal is to make our mother happy. I want to study at a foreign university and want to support my mother. I’m hoping to visit her inside Burma next year.

Recently, I spoke to Sai Lao’s grandmother, Daw Shwe Aye (not her real name), by telephone in her village near Muse. She talked about her son, Han Khay, and how his addiction affected his family.

"I knew he used opium before he got married. I also told him if you used opium, your wife and children would have trouble. Whenever I told him, he agreed," she said during the interview.

 She said he continued to use opium even though friends encouraged him not to.

“He demanded 3000-4000 Kyat from me every day. If I didn't pay money, he sold valuable things from my house to spend on opium. He spent most of his time away from my home,” she said.

"I sympathized of my grandsons. So, I sent their father to Lashio 3 times to rehab so he would stop using drugs. But, he could not stop using opium. Sai Lao loved his father. He used to wait until midnight for his father to return home. My son (Sai Lao's father) was very bad. Sometimes he demanded money in front of his sons. I told him not to demand money in front of my grand children. I didn't want my grandchildren to learn this kind of behavior.”

Daw Shwe Aye said her son’s behavior drew harsh criticism from the community against the whole family, including her.

Han Khay died four years ago, at age 39.

Sai Lao’s grandmother said he is honest and is a very quiet and calm young man. She worried, however, that he suffered under the social pressure of being the son of a drug addict.

“He was very sensitive,” she remembered. “One day, Sai Lao came back from school but his face showed he was unhappy. When I asked what happened he told me with tears that his friends called him 'son of opium addict' at school. I encouraged him. Then, I also explained the situation to the school teachers and requested they take care of my grandchild. I tried my best to support him in every way until he passed 10th grade," grandmother Daw Shwe Aye said.

Despite the challenges caused by his upbringing, Sai Lao said he wants to be a father himself someday and that he has learned valuable lessons from his father’s mistakes.

“I will never break my family like my father had done. If I get married, I want to raise my children very well,” he said during the interview. 

“I will also take care of my grandparents. If they didn't raise me, my life would be ruin. They are my saviors.”

He said, “I think parents should consider how their actions affect their children before they do something. I was lucky I didn’t end up in an orphanage. I don't know where I would be today. As well, I want to say people should not use or sell opium. I tell my life story and the suffering my father’s opium addiction caused for us because I want to let people know about the negative effects of opium.
Parents are the roots of their children’s lives. If the roots die, the plant cannot grow well.